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fun stuff travel Weekend

Lost in translation – google translate funny error

Google translate funny error shows it doesn’t always get it right

Was browsing TripAdvisor with a view to going to Majorca on holiday. I’ve always associated Majorca with pile em high sell it cheap holidays I would be unlikely to take. However I’m told that the North and East sides are v nice so I’m checking it out.

TripAdvisor is the number 1 destination for this sort of thing and there indeed I did go. Clicking on the description of one attraction I realised I could do with the help of Google Translate. That’s when I came across this google translate funny error. The photos herein just show that Google Translate doesn’t always get it right. At least I assume that’s the case.I doubt it meant to say “the children not easily rectum curves” although I didn’t try interpreting the Italian original myself.

One imagines that there re millions of examples of this sort of thing. Innit. For those thinking where’s he looking at then I’m thinking Port de Pollenca. If anyone’s been let me know how it was for you. We have a very rare 10 day window in August and it has been a good 7 years since we had an overseas holiday.

In looking for a destination our problem is that none of us are lie on the beach types.Also we don’t want it too hot and don’t want to have to go long haul, at least for this trip. The med is a good bet but there isn’t anywhere in the med that isn’t hot at this time of year. Ah well.

We will probably spend the cash and get back to find that the UK has basked in the best sunshine in living memory with Skegness having record crowds. No chance. Couple of posts of interest: Skegness in winter and then 6 months later.screenshot of tripadvisor in italian pre google translate funny error

google translate funny error screenshot

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Apps End User fun stuff gadgets google H/W internet piracy

Yes, I Read Super Hero Comic Books

There are far worse things you can carry from childhood to adulthood than super hero comic books (and fewer that look better on your tablet screen).

For me, super hero comic books are just one of those things. I loved them as a child in single digits, continued to look in on them occasionally (and sometimes more often than that) through my teens, and plugged in harder than ever when Frank Miller and Alan Moore took them to the edge of serious dark pop art in my early 20s. I suppose I lost the thread somewhat as my 30s approached, though I am not sure if that was me or the simple fact that both Marvel and DC jettisoned creative storytelling during the 1990s in favor of marketing tricks designed to make every issue a collectible (not to forget to mention doubling the price of single issues…and then doubling it again). Regardless, moving to Paris — a land where reading comic books is less a geek tattoo and more proof of an enlightened mind — hooked me back in kinda-sorta, a side effect of my haunting the English language comic shops in and around the Rue Dante lying in wait for the latest can’t-miss graphic novels by the likes of Art Spiegelman, Chris Ware, and Daniel Clowes, among many others. And I am sure that is where I would be today — hooked back in kinda-sorta — were it not for the darn things all going digital.

I don’t recall the first time I read a comic book on a computer, though it certainly predates my 2008 Mac re-entry. I do remember, though, how awkward it felt, viewing each scanned page one at a time before moving on to the next page using the → key or the Space bar. I also remember how annoying it was to have to hit the ← key repeatedly to go back to check some plot detail I skimmed past (annoyance that was multiplied by having to then hit the → key repeatedly to return to where I had left off). It all felt so trivial at the start, so “Take it or leave it.” And I left it. For a while, anyway, I left it.

Mostly, I left it. OK, every now and again, usually nipping at the heels of 3AM, I would download some issue in the Batman or Daredevil scheme of things and indulge (won’t say how or from where or whether it was a legal happenstance or not, no way). Just to stay up on the story, you know? Keeping up with the characters, these old friends of mine from childhood/teenagehood/young adulthood..whichever ‘hood I am inhabiting as I barrel towards 50.

And then My Missus brought home the iPad.

Like so many of us, I was tuned into the whispers and rumors of the iPad that were flying thick and furious during the back half of ‘09 and up through its introduction by Steve Jobs in late January of 2010. By the time of that announcement, though, I had driven an iPhone around the town a little bit without falling under its spell, and at first blush the iPad looked like nothing more than an iPhone on growth hormone. Interesting? Sure. Curious? You bet, because it was the birth of a new gadget category (and, naturally, because it was a new Apple product). Necessary? Uh…no. Not for anyone who had access to a computer and/or smartphone, anyway.

Not long after the iPad announcement I was able to put my hands and fingers on one of the first to make it to France. I can slide the apps pages back and forth. Smooth. I can touch an icon and open an app. Expected. It plays music and movies. Hmm. OK. Here you go, and thanks for letting me play with your new iPad. Enjoy. Oh…uh…can you make phone calls with it?

So getting back on track…a first-generation iPad made its way past over the Chez Kessel moat towards the end of ‘10, courtesy of My Missus, who as a publisher had been tasked with starting down the path of developing textbooks for the darn thing. Again, I held an iPad in my hands, and again I swiped the screen from side to side, touched app icons to watch the apps open, and clocked that it could be used to input music and video content. Then just as I was about to hand it back I had the thought, “I can read .pdf files on it, and book files in Amazon’s .mobi format…maybe…YES!”

Digital comic books, most often traded in .cbr (Comic Book Reader) and .cbz (Comic Book Zip), had proved to be a somewhat strange experience on a computer screen, but the iPad looked like it just might be a worthy delivery vehicle for suchness. And when a short google-bing turned up info on Cloudreaders, a free program able to read files in these two file formats (.pdf, too), I was on my way back to regular sustained web-slinging, shield-wielding, power-ringing, bataranging, billy-clubbing, hammer-throwing, repulsor-raying…OK, I’m OK. Can stop that now.

Now I had the means and the method, but what about the content? Well, as I stated earlier WITHOUT ADMITTING TO ANY INAPPROPRIATE ACTION OR BEHAVIOR, at some point I became aware of ways in which a person with an interest in doing so could easily obtain digital super hero comic books and at no cost. Speaking further about that person and their interest, it is a fact that pulp science fiction and comic books were among the very first pieces of “analogue” reading materials to be fan-digitized, to the point now where it is seriously difficult to think of content that cannot be had, ripe and ready for e-reading (and quickly, at that). Just to illustrate, do-do-that-goo(gle)goo(gle)-that-you-do-so-well on the following terms: “Complete Marvel Chronology” and look for links to Internet file-sharing destinations that I AM NOT TELLING YOU TO CLICK-THROUGH TO.

To close, I will share here that I really was (am!) one of those cliched kids whose now-priceless super hero comic book collection fell victim to tragic circumstances. In my case, “tragic” means a parental ultimatum issued: I could sell my comics at our “We’re Moving” yard sale or I could give them away, but there was no way they were being placed on the truck that would complete our summer 1976 family transfer from Chicago to Dallas. I unloaded hundreds of valuable pulpy friends* for $0.07 to $0.10 each on that August day, imagining not for a moment that I might be reunited with them someday down some dusty ol’ digital road (feel free to replace “digital road” with “information superhighway” if you must, because I just cannot bring myself to do so).

*Valuable to me, that is. Despite all of the ballyhoo I offer, my comic book collection wasn’t priceless…most of the issues were in tattered well-read condition, in fact, and fewer than five pre-dated 1970. I did, though, have issues 121, 122, and 129 of “The Amazing Spider-Man”, and you most assuredly did not.

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Engineer events fun stuff voip voip hardware

England v India Trent Bridge – a tale of two Andersons & Yealink VoIP phone

England v India highlights – Root & Anderson  10th wicket world record, I am nearly knocked out by a cricket ball, Pamela Anderson gets cricketer autograph & I spot a Yealink VoIP phone.

England v India at Trent Bridge was the backdrop for  great day out with the kids yesterday. There are two ways to “do” the cricket. One is with your mates. This is a boozy day out beginning with a pint and “full English” at 10am in the pub followed by a steady day’s cricket watching and a curry to finish off. The other is with the kids.

It was with the kids yesterday that I was nearly knocked out by a cricket ball and saw Pamela Anderson getting an autograph from one of the English players fielding at the boundary.

Arriving early we took our seats and settled in to watch a bit of net practice. Sat at square leg the nets were just in front of us but after a while the kids wandered off to look around the ground. There I was minding my own business, not particularly watching anything, when suddenly I heard a cry and I was hit by a cricket ball.

The ball glanced off the side of my head, hit my shoulder and plopped down beside me. It took me a moment to realise what had happened. One of the batsmen in the net had hit it over the top of the side netting. A couple of inches to the right and it would have landed squarely on the top of my bonce with potentially lethal consequences.

Without thinking I picked up the ball and threw it back. I should have kept it as a souvenir. There is evidence of the incident however. My hat – pictured in the gallery below was somewhat damaged as you can see.

Test match cricket is a great day out. The entertainment is not just on the pitch. The crowd provides just as much fun as the players. In the gallery below you can see a steward trying to confiscate a “beer snake” which is a stack of empty plastic beer glasses. Much beer is drunk at these events. For some reason the stewards want to confiscate the stacked glasses. The snake gets handed around the stand, growing in size as more glasses get added on the journey. The steward trying to confiscate the snake provides great sport as each time he gets near the snake is passed along to someone else.

In the gallery below there is also a photo sequence where “Pamela Anderson” gets the autograph of one of the England fielders. Pam was there with a party of lifeguards sat quite close to us in the New Stand. Also look out for a couple of horses sat amongst the crowd.

As far as the actual England v India cricket match went we were treated to a world record tenth wicket stand of 198 runs between Joe Root (154 no) and Jimmy Anderson (81 and no relation to Pamela afaik). The game now looks like being a draw and the rain forecast for the last day will hopefully provide some respite for the English team, now fielding, who have another test starting in a few days time.

There is, as is often the case, a technology slant to this post. Hanging around the boundary at lunch I couldn’t help noticing a Yealink VoIP phone nestled in amongst the equipment of one of the cameras. I love spotting little things like this. The kids have got used to it. The Yealink VoIP phone is not dissimilar to the Cisco I spotted at the Harbour Lights cafe in Peel in the Isle of Man. I’m not sure what the Yealink VoIP phone model is. I’m sure someone out there will know:)

Categories
Bad Stuff broadband End User fun stuff Legal Net piracy

Geo Restriction Means a Pirate’s Life for Me…

Accessing the whole of creation…what is available in my “region” of it, that is.

A regular contributor to trefor.net, we are as always pleased to present insight from James Blessing, the current Chair of the Internet Service Providers Association (ISPA) UK.

Once upon a time in the west, a man sat and contemplated the state of the world and the marvels that now existed upon his doorstep. With a simple gesture he could now access the whole of creation, every song that’s ever been sung, every work of art painted or love poem written in a moment of teenage angst. And the cats, don’t forget the cats…

Maybe that’s the future, it’s almost the now, but there is a problem that means that “every” gets dropped on the floor and is replaced with the slightly less poetic “everything that we could managed to get the licensing conditions approved for in your country right now, but maybe not next week” and that problems is lawyers.

When I started to think about this article I was going to focus on the benefits of the Internet and broadband, and then I tried to watch a clip from the late show…and then I changed tack. This isn’t the first time — and it won’t be the last — when content isn’t available in my “region”, where geo restriction has reared its head and made it so that if I want to watch content I have to either fire up a VPN to the “right region” and watch the content from there, or I will have to  head over to a friendly Pirate resource and unleash a p2p application. Do you want to know the worst bit about this? The content was being pushed to me by the DailyShow itself.

Sorry, but this video is unavailable from your location

And it gets worse. Wil Wheaton has written a blog about this very topic, in fact, as he’s seeing an ever increasing number of people using bittorrent to download his new show, and he is worried that if it continues the show won’t be renewed. It even pushed me into writing a quick email to Syfy UK (the network that produces the show in the US), but even they can’t get the show:

We instigated proceedings to acquire the UK rights, but a number of legal complications surrounding differences in UK and US clip clearance legislation, have unfortunately prevented us from doing so.

Now here is something that needs fixing. I have no “magic bullet” solution, as there are too many vested interests that won’t have a sensible conversation unless someone waves a stick at them and the politicians seem to be too scared of big media to unleash their sticks. There is an election next year, though, and it sure would be nice if one (or all) of the parties could commit to making an effort to resolve this issue…your local MP could be an excellent place to start!

Editorial note – check out our new site – BroadbandRating.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Categories
broadband End User fun stuff

Isaac Newton woz ere but no superfast broadband in Grantham

Isaac Newton woz ere, according to the plaque on the wall but no superfast broadband in Granthan

I was picking up Kid3 from a gig in Grantham’s St Wulfram’s Church last weekend. Nice enough gaff as churches go, if you like that sort of thing. Kid3 plays in the Lincolnshire County Orchestra – it has a name but that eludes me as I write as it has changed over the years. Before picking him up I hung around the graveyard for a bit, as you  do and couldn’t fail to notice a plaque on the wall opposite.

It read “In this hall of the King’s School Isaac Newton was taught 1654 – 1660. This plaque was set up to mark the tercentenary of the visit of the Royal Society 1960”.

Another of those, “gosh was he really” moments, somewhat akin to me seeing the Meccano bike but different. Now I’m not really comparing Isaac Newton to a Meccano bike. He was a superstar of literally earth moving magnitude, having “discovered” gravity or at least being the first person to notice what it was he was looking at.

Interesting to muse that Newton lived in the 17th Century and thus would have had little conception of technologies that exist today. They probably didn’t even know what a virus was in those days let alone a computer virus. In the interest of fitting with this week’s broadband theme I did a broadband availability check on Newton’s Alma Mater, or at least of the church over the road. The results are given below:

BT BROADBAND AVAILABILITY CHECKER

For Postcode NG31 6RR

Featured Products Downstream Line Rate(Mbps) Upstream Line Rate(Mbps) Downstream Range(Mbps) Availability Date
WBC ADSL 2+ Up to 17 10 to 19.5 Available
ADSL Max Up to 7.5 6.5 to 8 Available
WBC Fixed Rate 2 Available
Fixed Rate 2 Available
Other Offerings
Copper Multicast Available

 

For all ADSL and WBC Fibre to the Cabinet (FTTC) services, the stable line rate will be determined during the first 10 days of service usage.Throughput/download speeds will be less than line rates and can be affected by a number of factors within and external to BT’s network, Communication Providers’ networks and within customer premises.The Stop Sale date for Datastream is from 30-Jun-2012; the Formal Retirement date for Datastream is from 30-Jun-2014. The Stop Sale date for IPstream is from 31-Dec-2012; the Formal Retirement date for IPstream is from 30-Jun-2014.Note: Please note that postcode and address check results are indicative only. Most accurate results can be obtained from a telephone number check.Thank you for your interest.

I wonder if they knew it was Isaac Newton asking for superfast broadband in Grantham whether they would have accelerated the roll out in the area. After all with such a great mind what discoveries might be hindered by the lack of uplink speed. Hanging out with his scientific cronies would certainly not have been a great experience. Better maybe than the several months round trip time for a letter in those days.

Note the formal retirement date of 30th June 2014 for IPstream. This was the old ADSL backhaul network. BT moved ISPs on from this to it’s 21CN version years ago by making cost of bandwidth on the newer service far more attractive than IPstream.

Categories
fun stuff Weekend

Lego Birthday Cake – For a 60-Year-Old

There is something poignant about a 60 year old getting a lego birthday cake.

Kid3 plays the trumpet and each year since he was around 13 he has  been asked to blow the last post at Remembrance Day services. There is something hugely poignant about a boy playing the Last Post. The new generation paying their respects to the people who died to make his life possible.

At the other end of the spectrum it seems quite appropriate that a bloke celebrating his 60th birthday does so with a lego birthday cake. As you can see from the featured picture the candles were made of lego.

The lego candles were very artistic. When lit the candle wax ran down the side of white icing on the cake, as if the cake was bleeding bringing further poignancy to the evening.

Didn’t last long. Soon the cake was destroyed, consumed, rendered into oblivion with only the fleetest of memories lingering after what was an entirely adult evening in the West Wend Tap. Quite fortunately, pixel technology has allowed us to hold on to the vision.

I personally rarely get a birthday cake let alone a lego birthday cake. Mrs Davies is trying to get me slimmer. I have to satisfy myself with slices of others’. It would be churlish to turn down a slice of lego birthday cake. Innit? Fortunately as we have four offspring this is a reasonably regular occurrence and as the kids like to do home baking, often making cakes at the spur of a free moment I don’t do too badly. My personal favourite is chocolate with a cream filling but the most important thing is that the cake is light and fluffy.

Pictures below – sign at West End Tap and another sign at a bar at the Students Union at Newcastle University (fwiw). Oh and the birthday boy? Terry Mackown.

The snug

mensbar

 

Categories
Engineer engineering food and drink fun stuff peering

Pissup in a Brewery – Photographic Proof of a Great LONAP-Sponsored Evening

Pictures from the trefor.net Pissup In A Brewery held at the Fourpure brewery in London on Thursday 26th June

The Pissup In A Brewery, twas a good night. Sponsored by LONAP it was mostly LONAP members and guests. The rain held off, the food was universally acclaimed as fantastic, the beer was pure, copious and appreciated by all.

I’ve been to two other Pissup In A Brewery events, or Pissups In A Brewery. The first was with Bethesda RFC to a brewery in Liverpool, Castle Eden I think it may have been although time plays tricks with the memory, especially where a brewery is involved. We declined a tour of the brewery in order to maximise the efficiency of our two hours’ free bar. You can imagine the carnage of a coach load of rugby players let loose in the bar. We stopped in Rhyl for fish and chips on the way home. That’s all I can remember.

The other Pissup In A Brewery was at Batemans’ in AWainfleet. Wainfleet was once a port but the river has long since silted up and it is now a cosy village a few skims of a flat stone from the coast. It was a friend’s birthday and we didn’t find out until the end of the trip that he had paid for the lot of us.After the tour we retired to a pie and a pint on one of the local Batemans pubs. V civilised.

Last Thursday’s Pissup In A Brewery was held at Dan Lowe’s Fourpure brewery in South Bermondsey a stone’s throw from Millwall FC. Nuff said. You will note that the phrase Pissup In A Brewery gets repeated a number of times in the post. This is simply because the phrase to me seems to have become a brand in its own right. I can envisage having lots of pissups in lots of breweries. Reality is we might just repeat it next year, Dan Lowe and sponsorship willing. Like I said, twas a great night.

Thanks to LONAP for the sponsorship, thanks to Fourpure Brewery for having us, thanks to Richard Gibbs Catering for a great barbecue and thanks to all who came and enjoyed themselves and helped makeit such an enjoyable night.

Categories
fun stuff Weekend

Relax

relax

Categories
events food and drink fun stuff Weekend

trefor.net website launch party – 4pm Friday 4th July

You are all invited to a free beer on Friday afternoon to celebrate the launch of the new trefor.net website – free beer.

Went to my mate Terry’s 60th birthday surprise bash at the West End Tap last night. It was a genuine surprise and nice to see the look of humility on the lad’s face when he saw how many people had turned out. Left at around 11.30pm – I’m somewhat of a lightweight these days although the fact that it was my fourth night out on the trot didn’t help. Looking forward to a quiet few days before being back in the Smoke on Wednesday.

When we got home there was a party still in full flow in our back garden. Kid3 celebrating his penultimate teen birthday. The noise had died down by the time we got in, fortunately for our relations with the neighbours and especially since I invested in a PA system. I don’t have what was traditionally called a stereo but I do have a PA system.

This morning the damage in the back garden wasn’t too bad. Nothing that a bit of hosing down didn’t sort out.

Life seems to be one long string of parties and bashes (is there a difference?). It’s good job I’ve started to go to the University of Lincoln gym which is only a 5 minute walk from the office. Need the counter effect of the 70 minute workout to offset the damages from the bashes (deliberate choice of words:). Free beer for all…

This coming Wednesday we have the 10th Anniversary of ITSPA party in the big Smoke. A big part of me says we are only here the once so we might as well enjoy ourselves whilst we are at it.

On Friday we are having an impromptu trefor.net drinks and nibbles out on the balcony at the office in Sparkhouse in Lincoln. The weather is going to be great and we will be filling the fridge the day before to make sure that the refreshments are appropriately cooled for our guests.

Everyone is welcome but we will need to know if you plan on coming so call me, message me, send a carrier pigeon, leave a comment etc. The doors will be locked so when you arrive ring my mobile and I’ll send someone from “Security” down to bring you up to the balcony. Alternatively shout up to the balcony at Sparkhouse – we will see you.

The party must finish around 7pm for no other reason that I am then heading over to the Lincoln Performing Arts Centre (LPAC) to watch a Zoe Rahman gig in which Kid3 who plays the jazz trumpet, amongst other instruments, is featuring.

Party is at Room 18, Sparkhouse, Enterprise Lincoln Building, Rope Walk, Lincoln LN6 7DQ. C ya there.

Other partyifically good posts include:

trefbash2013
Official video #trefbash2012
Pissup In A Brewery

Categories
Bad Stuff broadband chromebook Cloud End User fun stuff gadgets google H/W piracy social networking UC

The Hump Day Five (25-June-2014)

On Wednesday Trefor.net’s Editor-in-Chief serves up The Hump Day Five, a weekly collection of short (and not so short) glimpses of the life in progress.

1

Bolting to meet My Missus for a Pay-For-Weekend-Well-Spent swim (the value of which we will immediately negate with a hearty follow-up Mexican lunch), and just realized that my mobile phone charge is at 9%. And being that this is my still-hanging-on iPhone 4 that ‘9’ might as we’ll be a ‘2’ as over the three-something years iPhoneKory has occupied my key right-pocket space I have seen it go from 7% to black so many times…

Is seven the new zero?

2

Despite promising myself I wouldn’t do so, I hung until 02h00 on Sunday/Monday watching the USA-Portugal World Cup match on ESPN via SlingBox, all the way to its bittersweet 95th minute. And in spite of a poor connection and a wildly unbalanced announcer team (Ian Darke = terrific, Taylor Twellman = dead awful), and although France has been my one-and-only International association football team since I moved to Paris in 1999*, I could not help but get caught up in it all. This was helped along in no small measure by social media, as both my Facebook and Twitter feeds were crackling with excitement and the wonderful over-the-top enthusiasm borne of sports spectatorship. Every breakaway, clearance, crossover, save (Tim Howards’s remarkable double-save!), and goal, by the USA or Portugal, had my feeds flying fast. But with that insane last play, with less than 25 ticks left in Injury Time…silence.

Yes, silence. The stunned heartbreak of that gorgeous equalizer — its sheer beauty cannot be denied — led to what may very well be the loudest imaginable Internet silence I’ve ever (not) heard. I have no doubt that goal was replaying on constant loop through the minds of a great many Americans on Monday, I am just as certain it was doing so in a soundproof vacuum.

*No true lover of the “Beautiful Game” will ever forget France’s unbelievablyf*ckingamazing come-from-behind last-gasp victory against Italy in the Euro2000 final, a game…no, an experience that galvanized this transplanted American’s association football fandom.

3

Readers going back three months — my long-term dyed-in-the-wool fans — will remember my enthusiasm for the latest Marvel Studios film, “Captain America: The Winter Soldier”, and perhaps even the near-pathological (pathetic) need I had to see the film after having to wait 10 days following its release to find my way to the cinema. (And no matter if you aren’t one of those readers, because my preface sentence sets the table for where I am heading, regardless.)

With all of the build-up, all of the hype, the fact that I so thoroughly enjoyed “Captain America: First Avenger” (I expected to hate that first film as the character is an all-time favorite of mine — since I started reading super hero comic books at the age of eight — and just figured there was no way Hollywood could get it right), the scads of terrific reviews I was so careful to scan-without-spoiling, you would think that disappointment was inevitable. Not only was this not the case, though, but the film so deeply captured my imagination that I soon after found myself pondering a newed look in on the comic book itself, figuring the source material for such a great flick might be worth my time.

In days of yore (and up until actually not all that long ago), it was a lot more difficult to find and read back issues of comic books than it is today. In fact, without admitting to anything here or anywhere, I will say that despite my predilection for riding near the cusp of the Internet for lo on 20+ years now, I still find myself utterly floored by the ready digital availability of comic books new and old (and extremely old). A minimal amount of surfing revealed that “Captain America: The Winter Soldier” was based on Ed Brubaker’s run on the “Captain America” title from 2004-2012, and a single google-bing turned up the following torrent:

Brubaker Cap Torrent

WTF?

4

In less than a year I will turn 50, a number on the age scale that I know is supposed to mean…something. A greater sense of dignity? Less prone to silly excitements? Better perspective on what was and is and will be? Conversations turning ever more towards health issues? Yadda yadda yadda. To all of that, I have to call “Bunk!”, because (1) in my mind’s eye I am not balding, overly thick in the middle, saddled with mild hearing loss, or in need of glasses to read, (2) I feel no less a thirst for life than I did 10 years ago…or 20, and (3) I still get all kinds of giddy in the lead up to putting my mitts on new techy toys…such as the new KoryChrome (Samsung Chromebook 2), which I look forward to running my fingers over for the first time at some point tomorrow!

5

Today is the first day of summer vacation for The Boy, and he is marking it in style, sitting on the couch in front of the TV while simultaneously playing both “Minecraft” and “SimCity 4” with friends on his MacBook, and also looking in on “Clash of Clans” via the family iPad. Now if only he could get his toes engaged in some kind of input manipulation My Missus and I would have one reasonably efficient and well-entertained child! The drums, perhaps?

Related posts:

Categories
competitions fun stuff travel Weekend

World cup football – the movie

fifa_250The football world cup reminds me of the movie “Those magnificent men in their flying machines”. For those far too young to remember the movie was a comedy where pilots of many different nationalities converged on the UK to participate in a flying race to Paris. There were joke teams, dastardly skulduggery that went wrong, love interest and all the typical sterotypes of the British psyche. The good guys won. of course.

Now many nationalities from around the world have flown in to Rio for a competition. There is heroism, pathetic failure and skulduggery, excitement, high tension and disappointment – the English team is going home early. No sign of a love interest sub plot though – the WAGs were banned from convening. That was a waste of time wasn’t it? Perhaps had the wives and girlfriends been allowed to travel the team might have done better.

I happened last night to be watching Uruguay v Italy in a fairly disinterested way until the “alleged”1 biting incident made me want Italy to win. That was the skulduggery. Oh and there are match fixing allegations.

And all this under the umbrella of an organisation that is itself under suspicion for lack of transparency and dodgy dealings. One has to ask why anyone bothers when you can watch a cricket test match that lasts the full five days and goes down to the penultimate ball for a result. At least with the world cup we haven’t had news of brand police spoiling the party as was the case with the London 2012 Olympics. It must surely cost the sponsors just as much and doesn’t leave people with a bad taste regarding the organising committee.

Playing now on a TV screen near you – Football World Cup – The Movie.

Other footy related posts:

Watching the football
Summer of sports on steroids
HD video demand poses big questions for ISPs

1 aargh I’m starting to sound like the BBC – looked like a bite mark from where I was sat but there again I was thousands of miles away…

Categories
fun stuff Weekend

Carholme Golf Club 36 Hole Comp honours board.

Played Carholme Golf Club yesterday. Used to be a member but not been back for perhaps 25 years or more. Check out 1985 on the honours board for the 36 hole medal comp. Ahem.

Beautiful sunny day. Played crap but a good time was had with good company with a very refreshing lager shandy in the clubhouse after the game.

When I first moved to Lincoln I lived near Carholme Golf Club. Didn’t have a car in those days so I kept my clubs in a locker and used to walk there.

36 hole competition honours board ay carholme golf club in lincoln

carholme golf club lincoln

 

Categories
fun stuff travel Weekend

Alex Murphy’s Life in India: Driving

Guest contributor Alex Murphy is President at DCM Shriram and a Privilege Member at Rugby Football Union. From time to time will be sharing his thoughts and observations from his life in Gurgaon, Haryana, India. Today marks his first time writing for trefor.net.

The drive to work throws up the usual list of crazy antics this morning. However the bodies of four dogs lay by the side of the road, victims of late night speeding drivers who don’t even slow up at the point of impact. Their bodies will be gathered up later, taken away and boiled to make patent glue. I also got overtaken by a cop bike with flashing lights, with three cops on it, two with machine guns!

Alex Murphy

Every morning you see cars and auto-ricks full to the top with people. 10 in a fiesta sized car is nothing unusual and 16 in an auto-rick, about the size of an escort van, is my record. No seat belts, unrestrained children and 180,000 deaths a year. But there is no choice. 1.2 billion people have to move around. They have little money and they must share whatever mode of transport is available. If that means over loading cars, sitting on the roof of buses, hanging precariously onto trains, then that’s what they have to do to reach their destination. The goody goody mob from Europe, the anally challenged safety crazed serial jobs worth would explode if they looked at what goes on here. But there really is no alternative. The transport infrastructure simply does not exist to move the volumes who need moving daily in a controlled, safe way. Yes they take a risk every day getting on sub standard buses, auto-ricks held together with Sellotape and cars that would not be out of place in a destruction derby in UK. But the name of the game here is survival, and for that they are prepared to take the ultimate risk and tragically all too often pay the ultimate price.

I’ve also learned another important lesson this week, Indian drivers only look forward. Not left, right or backwards. They have no peripheral vision. They have mirrors, but mostly they are folded against the vehicle to stop two wheelers ripping them off. But as everyone only looks forward then it’s accepted that you only have responsibility for what’s in front of you. Thus when you join a main road from a slip road, it’s not your problem what’s coming from behind, they are responsible for varying their path to avoid collision. And it’s the same everywhere, if you are behind, you must find the solution. Funnily enough in a wired kind of way it works. The high levels of road deaths are not due to the quirky driving. They are usually speed, alcohol and truck related, with many being pedestrians who wander into the roads on the assumption traffic will stop, it doesn’t. Can it be changed? No I don’t think it can. I saw a guy on a mobile phone this morning so totally engrossed in his conversation he ran into a parked car. He drove on, without a second thought. Now, I still try and drive like a Brit, but truth be told if you give way, merge in turn, stop at red lights, drive the correct way down a dual carriageway, graciously let traffic in, then you will get nowhere very very slowly.

I love India, the most challenging place on earth, the most delightful people on earth, the most vibrant economy on earth…..did I mention the challenge? Oh and of course the traffic!

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Business food and drink fun stuff H/W internet wearable

Owed to the Laundromat

Friday afternoon finds me well-lunched (New Mexican-ish place that opened nearby about a month ago) and passing roughly 45 minutes at a laundromat that is about 100 steps from the door to our building in Paris’s 18th Arrondissement.

Decidedly not Web 2.0 — no wifi, no URL on the door or windows, no comment field anywhere upon which to register user opinion — the local laverie (that’s French for…well, I trust you can work that out, cherished reader) is actually proving to be somewhat comforting in the mere fact that it has seemingly not changed a lick since my first and only previous visit almost 13 years ago (that being right after My Missus and I moved into our flat at 57 Boulevard Barbes and before the delivery and hookup of our washer and dryer, natch). Of course, the pricing is different now with regard to both the amount and the currency, but everything else is the same or similar enough to register as such…the basic floor plan, types of machines in service, signage, the definitive lack of furniture upon which to wait for the various cycles to complete, the character stereotypes aiding me in occupying the place (and we aren’t talking butcher, baker, or candlestick maker)…

laverie

==> To answer the hanging question for the one person out there who might crave the answer, my lavage moment is brought to you today by frugality and a need to clean a winter duvet that is simply too bulky to launder at home (and which the La Famille Kessel decision-makers are good and sick of paying the teinturier — dry cleaner — upwards of €50 to clean every spring). <==

I must admit that a broad idiot’s smile broke across my face when I realized a few moments ago that this is only my 2nd time in a laundromat in a great many years. The reason for said smile being that before that September 2001 visit to my current perch — with the exception of 1993, a year I spent living in a big house with three other people (and a washer and dryer) — I could always count on spending two hours every couple of weeks passing the time exactly as I am now, reading and writing amongst giant industrial behemoths chewing on my washable wearables and slucking down my hoarded dimes and quarters for the privilege.

Through the dormitory years, frathouse life, this apartment, that apartment, another apartment, apartment-apartment-apartment, and on through a house that while cute and cuddly was simply not able to harbor a washing machine (let alone a dryer), it was a steady diet of laundromat boredom for me. Regular as phone bills and cheap thrills, lest I be a dirty boy.

In the early 1990s a wave of innovation washed over the public laundering industry in urban America, and before long laundering types had some options. You could have a drink and try your luck at picking up a fellow launderer while your clothes getting sudsed up, or you could bowl a game during the rinse cycle. Of course, the good old-fashioned laundromats that I tended to inhabit soldiered on — those offering a rundown pinball game or an ancient Pac-Man machine for entertainment…if that — but now instead of the dull sense of tedious contentment with which we old-fashioned launderers were familiar, we were instead subject to a new and strange sense of unease, knowing that somewhere out there on that mundane Laundry Night there were those who were dancing or enjoying karaoke while their unmentionables were tumbling.

Did I bite, you are no doubt wondering? Did I turn my back on the underprivileged and overworked, the single old-timers, the vagabonds and homeless folks with enough esteem to occasionally freshen and soften their garments, the students squeaking by on budgets too small to be seen with the naked eye? I did not! But then, none of the new-age laundromats were offering free Internet access.

Nearly a decade and a half of years pass. Have passed. Past. A quick google-bing today reveals that clean-your-clothes multi-tasking has continued to expand and evolve, with Laundromat-Cafés (yes, offering free wifi) and even Laundromat-Restaurants now heavy in the mix. All we need now is Laundromat-equipped office cubicle farms and the evolution of the public laundry arts will be complete.

Duvet spinning fast now. Yes, I do think there is a song in there somewhere, but it is just past the reach of my tongue at the moment. Two minutes to go and I am outtahere.

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End User fun stuff

Testing testing 1 2 1 2 – pixels from around a University @unilincoln

Ya get out of the office and what do you see? Well out front there are swans swimming lazily along on the water. The red brick building is the library. My office is to the left where that sticky out yellow bit is but on the other side.

swans outside Lincoln Uni students union

The library as seen from the back and just outside my office looks like this. Nice reflection in the glass. The site was a part of the old railway sidings near the now defunct St Marks Station in Lincoln. Not many students in there now that term is coming to an end (yay, school’s out, for summer).

Lincoln uni library

So this afternoon I walked to the gym. The route takes me past a pond of some sort. Watery stuff anyway. I saw this lifebuoy and was prompted to take a pic. I do that kind of thing.

lifebuoyGoing or some reason I cast my pixels on the other side and found no lifebuoy. Hope the students haven’t nicked it. That would be irresponsible. In my day it was estate agents signs. I make no judgement. I merely observe.

No lifebuoy in casing at Lincoln Uni

Next to the non lifebuoy I found a post that I found interesting enough to photograph. Andy Davidson would approve I’m sure although he would have done a better job of it. Note the football floating in the water behind the post. Oops or oh dear. You choose.

a postNext up is a view of the water. The floating football can be clearly seen, fwiw. Lots of algal growth on said water. No idea if there are any fish in there. Doubt it.

football on water at Lincoln UniAnd finally, my Lords, Laidees and gennelmun a view of a cherry picker outside the Gym. Looks like they are changing a light bulb. That’s the downside of having lots of street lights (Street Lights, there ain’t no place I can’t see – Crusaders Lincoln Uni remix version).

cherry picker at Lincoln University

This has been a test post to check out the photo sizing feature in WordPress. It works. Thanks Rob. More on photos in a couple of weeks time.

Other pixel filled university related posts worth a skeet:

A view of Lincoln University from the office

That’s all I could find.

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End User fun stuff gadgets H/W internet Mobile mobile connectivity Net phones wearable

Flying Away on a Wing and a Prayer

I’ve been daydreaming about technology. Again.

Oftentimes you will see me, fingers unmoving on my keyboard, my mind skimming the clouds (not “the cloud”), blissfully imagining features that I want/need/must have in my next computer.

**Cue dreamy fantasy, Fender Rhodes-ish, 1970s-era TV comedy music. Cue LOUD thunder crack.**

…a monster SSD (I recently carved a Samsung M9T 2TB HHD from a sealed-and-not-meant-to-be-opened Backup Plus external hard drive to install in AppleKory, so you know that when I write “monster” I am not messing around…s’gotta be BIG), a good degree of voice command capability, a separate GPU, a battery that can reliably deliver 10+ hours of juice regardless of use intensity, integrated cellular Internet connectivity, and — naturally — MacBook-level build quality across the board…

**Fade out goofy cue-in music underlay.**

Gadget This Gadget ThatIntegrated cellular connectivity. Something of a Holy Grail among a great many of us who drive MacBooks, this functionality has been on my “Features and Functions for AppleKory Upgrade” list (yes, I really do keep such a thing…don’t you?) for so long that I am not entirely sure I can reclaim the pixels. That said, my blue-sky tech whimsy is relegated not only to computers but also to smartphones, those marvelous wonders of technology that by their very nature connect to the Internet via cellular. Regular readers know, of course, that I am deeply ensconced (stuck?) in the the search for my next smartphone, which at this point still looks to be the Samsung Galaxy K Zoom. I have yet to actually put my hands on the GKZ, however, and as my near-decision to be among the Zoomed has me feeling as shaky as it does giddy, I am guessing there is a moment of reckoning waiting for me once the darn thing actually becomes available in France. Early reviews are all over the place, though they all seem to reflect less the smartphone’s build quality and feature set and more the usage values of the reviewers themselves. In aggregate, though, those reviews fall mostly in line with expectation, describing the not-so-little bugger as a “niche product”…a niche that, when described, sounds an awful lot like one into which I enjoy lanyard pass access. Still, it seems that every week there is yet another new player on the field that deserves consideration — just yesterday Amazon’s Jeff Bezos splashily announced his company’s entry to the Smartphone Wars, the Amazon Fire Phone, which has not one and not two but SIX cameras on-board — and until such time as I can try on the Galaxy K Zoom for size (and weight) my musings on the device will be blue-sky whimsy indeed.

**Cue dreamy fantasy, Fender Rhodes-ish, 1970s-era TV comedy music. Cue LOUD thunder crack.**

…ready to perform as smartphone and compact camera, and serving well as both while requiring the precious pocket space of of just one…sharp and responsive camera function, especially in low-light situations requiring tight optical zoom…well-designed apps serving essential and not-so-essential needs…easy and thoughtful interaction and synchronization with AppleKory…elevation of my walkabout effectiveness from the sludgy puddle into which my iPhone 4 currently has it imprisoned…ah, bliss…

**Fade out goofy music.**

Pie in the sky, baby!

So have you gotten the impression that for me it is all about the Internet? Nay, I say! Let’s have a little talk about tweedle beetles…er, cameras (and set aside the fact that many of them these days have some kind of Internet capability, because nobody buys a camera primarily for that). Up front, let me say that nearly four years in I continue to be utterly besotted with my Leica D-Lux 5 (the lovely Leyna). Despite this, however, nary a full day passes without me dropping into some camera review site or another (dpreview.com, I’m talkin’ ’bout you) and gorging myself on the latest this-and-that in the world of photo-taking apparatus goodness. My next camera…my next camera…

**Cue silly dream fantasy whatnot music for last time. LOUD thunder crack, too.**

…weather-resistant…compact size, but with interchangeable lenses…built-in wifi file transfer capability…insanely-high resolution EVF and rearview monitor…somewhat retro…finger-tingling build quality…

**Fade out. End the darn post already.**

Yes, yes, me likes me cameras.

Me also…I also (Bizarro voice only works in teeny tiny doses) thirst to soar with new-gadget-happy, like all qualifying tech geeks who have over the years read an embarrassing number of comic books and tuned into far too much sci-fi television. I am sorry to say, though, that the wearable-whatever getting most of the ink these days just isn’t getting me up to escape velocity. I haven’t worn a watch on my wrist since 1992, a streak that I cannot imagine coming to an end any time soon, iWatch or whichever Dick Tracy contraption notwithstanding (including this watch). And as for Google Glass, I have never been able to get my head around the idea of wearing glasses for reasons other than dire necessity (2-D cinema-going guy that I am), and more than halfway to my own personal Finish Line I have yet to encounter a pair of sunglasses that looked like anything other than a waste of money. iBelt? Amazon Fire Shoes? A power ring or magic lasso? No no no no no. I don’t daydream about wearing my gadget tech these days…I want it IMPLANTED!

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Pissup In A Brewery free tickets competition No 3 – corny football sayings

freebeer_250Yeehaw. Another day another competition to win tickets to the Pissup In A Brewery. Today is a big world cup football day for England so I thought that we’d keep it simple. Hit me with a corny or funny football related saying or quote. Best ones will get tix. eg it was a game of two halves, really pleased for Chalky, thought Nobby did well to get his head to that one etc. Can’t reuse these ones obvs – I’m sure you can do better. Read about other unbelievable but true competitions: What is my favourite beer? Win free VIP tickets to a Pissup

No Divingfifa_250

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fun stuff

A game of two halves, a bit of extra time and the hopes of a nation – England v Uruguay

fifa_250England v Uruguay – trefor.net reports in the build up to the latest most important match for England.

England v Uruguay – a game of two halves, report on two halves for an audience of two halves – I suspect that a big chunk of the readership of this blog are not the least bit interested in football. I’m not particularly interested meself. Although you do occasionally get an exciting match this is quite rare and games are often quite tedious with very few goals to liven up the proceedings. This is usually the case when it comes to FA Cup Finals where both sides are more desperate to not lose than to win and also England games where the team rarely gels and offers a cardboard display of football.

Tonight then is the big one. It’s not big in the same way that the World Cup Final is big. It’s big in the sense that once more England need to win to have a hope of proceeding to the next stage of the tourney. The problem is that Uruguay are in the same boat so they aren’t going to just roll over and say “oh okay then”. If this was a run of the mill international you would probably bet on Uruguay to win. As it happens this game is a little akin to the FA Cup where there may well be a favourite but actually anything can happen.

Mind you I don’t feel the same sense of excitement in the air that existed during the last world cup where the whole country seemed implausibly optimistic about progression “at least through to the semis and then who knows…”. I will watch the game as the kids and my wife will be sat in front of the TV with the latter getting particularly emulsional.

I envisage several posts match interview texts being prepared:

The win: I was really pleased for the lads. It was a game of two halves and we went in to the dressing room at half time knowing we had a job to do. Some of the senior players had their say and we went out for the second half determined to do our best for the fans. I thought that Nobby was outstanding in defence and Jacko’s goal was superb. He could easily have had two or three more. Davo was his brilliant self and some of his passes really made the differences from the left wing. The real hero for me though was Bert in goal. How he managed to keep that Carlos/Louis/Juan/Miguel/Josef/Pablo/Emile/Rodgigo 1 goal out in the last minute of added time I will never know. We now have go back to our hotel, relax a bit and prepare for the next match.

The loss: Gutted…disappointed…things just didn’t work for us out there tonight…   nngggg   …   guurrrgghh   …   Dobbo   …

The press is going to have a field day whatever the result. A win will mean lots of further excitement on the first 20 pages of the tabloids. Page 3 will have a girl wearing nothing but a pair of England football shorts and waving two flags of St George. A loss will have calls to sack the manager, demands for an independent high level investigation into why the team is so crap and never gets anywhere on the big stage together with loud mutterings that the Premier League might well be the best in the world but there aren’t enough English players playing in it.

Ah well. The game could go either way. The most important thing is to make sure that the fridge has enough beer in it to last the whole match.

Who loves ya baby?

1 take yer pick

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competitions food and drink fun stuff peering

Win more Pissup In A Brewery tickets – competition # 2 – what is my favourite beer?

freebeer_250Okeydokey here goes competition number 2. Seeing as this is a Pissup In A Brewery we are talking about what is my favourite beer? There are clues to be found around trefor.net but I’m not going to help you any more than that.

Answers by noon tomorrow as after that I have to go to a speed reduction seminar that starts at 1pm – 36 in a 30. Fair cop guv. Slap the cuffs on.

If you missed competition number one here it is but it is now closed. Note 19 LinkedIn shares fair play. LinkedIn members have their priorities set right.

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events food and drink fun stuff

Win free VIP tickets to Pissup In A Brewery

freebeer_250Every day this week you can win a free VIP ticket worth £120 to the world famous trefor.net Pissup In A Brewery. trefor.net is known for its Christmas bash. Well now we have a summer bash and it is genuinely a Pissup In A Brewery.

The venue is the new Fourpure Brewery, one of the industry’s rising stars, where you can sample a wide range of real ales and lagers as brewed by one of London’s youngest and most exciting brewers, Dan Lowe.

Details of the event are here.

To win your free ticket you need to complete the following sentence “I like beer because…”. I might give out more than one prize if we get some good answers.

Deadline is sometime tomorrow morning at which point we will have a new competition.

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competitions End User events fun stuff H/W internet media Mobile mobile connectivity Net obsolescence piracy

Watching the Football

Yesterday a friend of mine in the UK asked me if I was “going to watch the football”, stating his own excitement over the soon-upon-us 2014 FIFA World Cup Brazil (the official label of the event, if the website is any indicator), and then asking “Have you converted a little? Soccer to you, I guess.”

Sigh.

I actually converted 20 years ago as a direct result of the excitement surrounding the 1994 FIFA World Cup. Of course, the football punditry out there will immediately assume that this American finally clued in that year due to the tournament being held in the U.S. for the first (and so far only) time, however that assumption would not only be disingenuous but wrong too. No, my sports imagination was finally captured by International football in 1994 not because I was swept up in host country hoopla, but because I was living/working/traveling Europe that year and found myself instead swept up in the remarkable national enthusiasm and spontaneous celebrations I encountered in England, Scotland, Belgium, Luxembourg, and Germany as the tournament played out. Walking around Namur, Belgium, for instance, on a Tuesday night in early July, seeking out a priced-right-for-a-backpacker dinner, I was left aghast and delighted by the string of cars going by with horns a-blarin’, people hanging out the windows hooting and hollering and waving the Italian flag. The people of one country so unabashedly showing their colors, whooping it up on the streets of another country…what is this International sporting thing, anyway? And then five days later, being fortuitous enough to be in Germany to witness first-hand the crashing out of the Germany team1…I was hooked!

1994. The world turned its eyes and ears to the most commercial country in the world to watch “The Beautiful Game” on television and radio, and only on television and radio. And not a single URL in sight.

When my pal asked me whether I was going to tune into the 2014 FIFA World Cup my knee-jerk first thought was “Will it be available via the Internet?” to which my second thought instantly responded “Are you kidding? Of course.” Sure, I know the games will be broadcast on television, and I am relatively sure the one we have in the main room still works (The Boy watches it from time to time…I think), but it wasn’t until long after I answered my friend’s oh-so-rhetorical question that I even paid a thought to the idea of actually using the device to watch a match.

Football TV

Naturally, the picture the Chez Kessel television delivers is plenty sharp (as so many are these days, we are Triple Play kitted), and something prompted me long ago to wire the sound to come through our stereo speakers (think it was the 2006 FIFA World Cup that prompted that…friggin’ Marco Materazzi, sister-and-mother-insulting classless b*stard), so it isn’t a poor viewing option that had me defaulting to the Internet as my top-of-mind football entertainment resource. It’s just…well…you see…c’mon, you know…it is so much easier to simultaneously Web-out with ⌘+Tab (Alt+Tab for the Windows-fettered readers out there, and whatever-equivalent for UNIX deities and whichever others) than it is via some lap-bound or hand-bound device supplementary to the television.

Addiction. Always lurking, eminently humanizing, and available in oh-so-many forms.

1994. When to the layman “Internet” meant email and bulletin boards and nothing more. The World Wide Web was just starting to poke its head up, and “streaming” was a word relegated to tape data backups.

Without admitting to anything (and there will be no Q&A), I will cagily say here that a long time has passed since I last watched a television program at the time of broadcast (other, that is, than hypnotized channel-surfing-and-staring borne of jetlag). This is not to say that I am accomplishing the impossible, foregoing television entertainment in what is unquestionably a golden age for the medium (too many programs to list, but suffice it to say that I can speak “The Wire”, “The Sopranos”, “Breaking Bad”, “Mad Men”, and this Millenium’s “Battlestar Galactica” reboot with anyone…buncha great UK-produced programs, too!). I do, though, manage to forego the starchy advertising that comes with all of the good TV meat on offer, and without littering my shelves and floorspace with DVD sets gathering dust.

Yes, packaged up nice-and-digital and stripped of its impurities, television for me has come to mean the Internet. And I find it a richer and far more satisfying experience for that, too.     ==>Twenty-three minutes into the sixth episode of Season Two of “The Americans” a reference is made to an earlier plot point that I skied past. Pause. ⌘+Tab to Google Chrome. Type “The Americans episodes ” into the Address/Search field. A quick click and read. ⌘+Tab back to VLC. Un-Pause. Good to go.<==     Of course, certain television events practically demand in-progress viewing — cannot-turn-away news events and, yes, some sporting events (though "condensed" recordings can now be acquired after the fact, such as three-plus hour American Football games boiled down to 58 minutes!) — but these have not kept that really big monitor in our flat's central room from looking more and more novel with each passing season. 1994. Televisions were definitively three-dimensional, whereas the scripted programming they delivered to the quivering and drooling masses was two-dimensional at its very best. Which inevitably brings me back to "watching the football". I imagine that as was the case the last time around, La Famille Kessel will ease slowly into 2014 FIFA World Cup action, eventually ramping up interest as the meaning of the games increases (and if France makes a move, as in '06, getting downright rabid about it all). And as that happens our somewhat dusty black Samsung-emblazoned flat-panel Living Room window into the Global Village (clichés flowing thick and furious here at the end) will no doubt once again find its purpose.   1Is there anyone who isn’t German that likes to see Germany win at anything? 🙂

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Engineer fun stuff

Announcing the trefor.net Pissup In A Brewery

Ever been to a Pissup In A Brewery? Well we at trefor.net like to let our hair down and this summer are having a BBQ with a difference. It is indeed a “Pissup In A Brewery”, sponsored by LONAP and  located at Dan Lowe’s Fourpure brewery in South Bermondsey, just 5 minutes from London Bridge.

Folk that have been to #trefbash events will not want to miss this. Get your tickets ere (Roll up, roll up roll up.) Scroll down for more information & lookout for some free ticket competitions over the next week or two.

We can start with a ticket for whoever can describe the best drinking game they have ever taken part in. My decision is final, I may award more than one prize and it may well be that the winner is drawn out of a proverbial hat (blessed are the cheesemakers or words to that effect).

Event registration for The trefor.net pissup in a brewery powered by Eventbrite
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End User food and drink fun stuff Weekend

Saturday Snapshot (07-June-2014)

Yesterday My Missus and I decided to cap off Saturday with “Skyfall” and a big bowl of pasta, figuring that at the ripe age of 12 The Boy and his visiting friend were both ready for a bit of Bond, made the all the more tasty accompanied by fussili drenched in freshly crushed-out pesto.

Being a well-raised soul I feel compelled to share the goods, however as 3-D food printers are still quite rare I will instead do the next best thing to help satisfy all of the hungry readers out there and share my pesto recipe, complete with not-very-good iPhone 4 photo illustration (still twiddling my thumbs waiting for Samsung’s imminent Galaxy K Zoom, but that is another story).

1. Get yourself some good walnuts.

1. Get yourself some good walnuts.

2. Gotta crack a few walnuts.

2. Gotta crack a few walnuts.

3. Trim and clean plenty of basil. When you think you have enough, double it.

3. Trim and clean plenty of basil. When you think you have enough, double it.

4. Place your basil into your mortar, and add a 1/2 teaspoon of coarse sea salt (for taste, of course, and to aid in the grinding).

4. Place basil into your mortar, and add 1/2 teaspoon of coarse sea salt (for taste and to aid in grinding).

5. Grind the basil into pulp, add your crushed walnuts, and keep grinding.

5. Grind the basil into pulp, add your crushed walnuts, and keep grinding.

6. Next, add your peeled and trimmed garlic...keep grinding.

6. Next, add your peeled and trimmed garlic…keep grinding.

7. Grind until you have a aromatic paste, heady and delicious.

7. Grind until you have a aromatic paste, heady and delicious.

8. Add olive oil. if you cannot be bothered to use a fine extra virgin olive oil, toss the paste in the trash and buy a jar of ready-made.

8. Add a fine extra virgin (preferably unfiltered) olive oil.1

9. Add freshly-grated parmesan to your oily paste and grind some more.

9. Add freshly-grated parmesan to your oily paste and grind some more.

10. Taste your pesto, adjusting salt, pepper, and oil until it is just right.

10. Taste your pesto, adjusting salt, pepper, and oil until it is just right.

 

Once you have your pesto ready to go, put that big pot of water on the boil. Cook pasta, drain, return pasta to pot, dump in pesto, mix it all up nice, add a tad more olive oil, mix one last time, and cue up “Skyfall” (or 2006’s “Casino Royal”, which works just as well). Serve with chopped tomatoes, chopped red onion, and extra grated parmesan on the side. Oh, you might want to make sure you have laid in a good supply of take-a-break-after-the-opening-credits ice cream, too.

1If you cannot be bothered to use a fine extra virgin (preferably unfiltered) olive oil, toss the paste in the trash, buy a jar of ready-made, and wallow in shame.

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fun stuff

Meet my new PA

Got a PA?  Every Chief Exec has one. I figured that trefor.net needed one so I engaged a specialist agent to find the ideal PA. A PA is very handy especially for events. Often it’s the only way to get a message across, the way to get noticed in the crowd. Having a PA is the way to extend your reach – be heard in places that would otherwise not hear you.

pa2_664

new trefor.net PA from studiospares.com

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fun stuff

The back end of a fire engine

fire engine in Lincoln

Thing is what’s not to like about fire engines?  This is a particularly old one but they built them to last in those days. Probably still do where fire engines are concerned. Same can’t be said about washing machines.

fire engine hose connectorsI was stopped behind this one at lights in Lincoln and was suitably impressed with the array of industrial strength hose connectors at the back. All sorts of questions began to bounce around the empty chambers of my mind. I need fire engine education. It’s a very long time since I visited the fire station in Caernarfon with the cub scouts.

How much water can this fire engine store? How long does it last when being used to put out fires – obviously related to the number of hoses being deployed. What are the different connectors for? Are some water  in and some water out? Looks like it supports four hoses. Whatr sized crew is needed to man the engine? Average number of call outs a day/a week? Response times? How many old ladies have had to be rescued from being stuck up trees1?

These are all extremely important questions. There are more. Mpg? Range? Engine size? Pump power (electrical and height they can squirt water)? I’m sure you can think of more. I don’t have the answers.

All I can tell you is that fire engines are in the same category as steam trains for coolness. Every small boy between the ages of one and one hundred and one likes fire engines. Me included or I wouldn’t have taken this photo. Wonder what the driver’s name was. Wonder when they are next repeating Fireman Sam? Station Officer Steele. Elvis, Bella Lasagne, Naughty Norman, all of em stars, A-listers.

Fire engines. What’s not to like?

Other posts of general interest to boys, young and old:

Rainfall measurement techniques – the bbq method
No socks – the bbq season is upon us

1 I know I know they shouldn’t be climbing trees at their age but some people never grow up and why should they?

Categories
End User fun stuff

I bought a Grill Cleaning T Brush from Tesco

bbq cleaning wire brush from tesco

wirebrush_350What’s a grill cleaning t brush I hear you say? There are two possible answers. It’s either

  • three quid from Tesco  or
  • a wire brush for cleaning barbecues

Or in this case both of the above.

There are a few observations to be made in respect of this particular grill cleaning t brush. One is that it is much cheaper than the grill cleaning t brushes from leading bbq manufacturer  Weber whose highly similar looking product retails between eight and eleven pounds depending on where you get it from. No doubt there will be some superior design nuances in the Weber version.

Then there is the very sensible and correct warning on the Tesco product packaging “Product contains a functional sharp point, please take care. Please retain this information for future reference.” Thank you Tesco. Yes I will take care although I’m not sure about the practicalities of keeping the information label.

Next time I clean the bbq how quickly would I be able to retrieve this packaging for a reminding read from the drawer full of other  similar bits of cardboard for the strimmer, lawnmower, various sets of knives, hedge trimmer and the wide variety of other previously purchased products with sharp bits to them. Perhaps Tesco should provide advice on this – a guide to warning label filing for beginners maybe.

wirebrush_label_350Finally there are the guidelines further on down the packaging indicating that I should both dispose of it in a bin and recycle it. Oh and the recommendation is that this particular t brush should be hand washed rather than placed in the dishwasher – I assume that’s the sign with the big X on it.

No suggestions as to how I should hand wash the brush whilst taking care to avoid any functional sharp points. Perhaps they sell a complementary set of armoured gloves for use in the sink.

Well I dunno. I think I’m confused. Maybe I’ll just chuck the paperwork and not bother cleaning the brush which would in any case be a first in the Davies household.

Does anyone know what the 22 PAP symbol thingy is? Perhaps it is a trick symbol and doesn’t have a meaning.

I know nothing.

Other unbelievably good bbq related reads include:

Rainfall measurement techniques – the bbq method
No socks – the bbq season is upon us

Categories
fun stuff

Hammock days

hammock panorama

Ah those crazy, hazy lazy days of summer, of wine and roses, the heavy scent of the flower filled border, a chilled bottle of rose, cream tea on the patio, the strains of Satchmo floating through the still air. Panama hat cocked at carefree angle.

The snooze on the hammock whilst listening to Test Match Special, waking up after an hour or so to find that not much has changed. The score has moved on a little. No more wickets. Chocolate cake in the commentary box. Thank you Mrs Abercrombie of Sevenoaks. Our Andy wins Wimbledon, again.

The stroll to the beer garden. Cold cold lager under the parasol. A dog flops its languid tail. The heat abates: barbecue time. Occasional burgers flipped, steaks sizzle, sticky sausages tanned brown, ketchup smeared faces wear satisfied smile, gather around the fire laughing, singing and playing the guitar until the light dies.

Leave the clearing up. Bed beckons but tomorrow never comes…

hammockSummertime, and the living is easy.  Get the gist?

#whensitgonnahappen

 

Categories
Engineer fun stuff

Gymnasium etiquette and staying in the zone

lincoln uni gym

Last week I took the plunge and joined Lincoln University gym. Drastic measures are called for – the lifestyle in this networking game is too social networking oriented, and I’m not talking about online social networks.

Anthony took me through a 1 hour induction process measuring weight, Body Mass Index etc etc etc although they don’t pay much heed to BMI at the gym – too many muscular blokes there that render the measurement irrelevant. I can’t remember all the parameters they measured. All I know is that some improvement is called for. It’s been sometime.

So I’ve got a programme that lasts somewhere between 60 – and 90 minutes and I’ve now been through it 4 times in the past week including 3 consecutive days this week. We have had a bank holiday weekend in that time so there have been forces pushing back against the weightloss/fitness. By yesterday I’d lost 1.3Kg since the induction session which considering the bank holiday ain’t too bad.

Before anyone says anything Anthony tells me it’s ok to train every day as the weights programme exercises different muscles in a 3 day rotation.

Now the main thing about Lincoln University gym is that most of the people there, me apart, seem pretty fit. Course they are all about thirty years younger than me so no wonder. It is somewhat disconcerting seeing blokes not only doing chin-ups but pulling themselves right up so that their arms go straight down by their sides – aka gymnasts on the rings – I can’t explain it any better and didn’t think it would be appropriate to take photos. It’s a good job the gym has a high ceiling otherwise they’d be banging their heads on it.

The other reason for not taking photos is because of the extremely fit girls in the room. It’s hard enough not to appear to be staring without causing more of a stir by using the camera. This means you have to develop a survival technique. Be seen to be in your own zone. Not staring at others. It’s all about etiquette I suppose. Just sneaked in the selfie of me in the pic above.

This means plugging in earphones and generally staring straight ahead. In the gym nobody talks to each other. They all stare straight ahead, sometimes at themselves in the mirror, or they stare at weights, assessing which ones to use next, presumably. Obviously to participate in this enforced zonality one needs to have ones own sounds. I happen to have some good stuff on my phone – Donna Summer’s Greatest Hits, Abba Gold and other quality material that has stood the test of time. My selection is fairly limited though so after 4 sessions it has become quite repetitive. I’m going to have to get some new tunes.

In the meantime the gym does provide four channels of TV on a screen at each workstation (or whatever it’s called). Most of what’s on offer is either crappy daytime TV or quite naturally, music channels. The music videos are quite illuminating. I’m sorry if this is not news to you but a big percentage of them seem to feature semi naked women jiggling around on screen.

In my day we had  Pan’s People and Hot Gossip but they were tame compared to what seems to be standard fare nowadays. I dunno. To understand where I’m coming from you need to realise that my fave movie is Mary Poppins. Nuff said.

Yesterday I plugged in to the gym sounds and fair play they were upbeat enough to up my pace and get my pulse going – the exercise did that, not the videos. The hardest part about going to the gym is that I have to walk home afterwards. Up Steep Hill for those who know Lincoln. For those that don’t know Lincoln Steep Hill is about a 1 in 1 gradient, or at least that’s how it feels even without having been to the gym. It’s not called Steep Hill for nothing.

You will be getting periodic updates on my progress in the gym, the regularity of which will depend on whether there actually is progress. If there is none I’ll be keeping quiet but expect to hear something soon:) My only short term problem is that at the end of next week I’m off to the Genband Perspectives conference in Orlando which will involve a week of conspicuous over consumption. It is the US of A after all. Let’s hope the hotel has a gymnasium eh?

Stay tuned. Hear it first on trefor.net.

revitalize at Lincoln University gym

Other really interesting exercise related posts:

There aren’t any. You will have to settle for these great food related posts instead:)

How to cook the perfect baked bean
Best pancake toppings
Important announcement on a Sunday morning

Categories
fun stuff

The Bench

heavy duty 1 ton viceI just ordered a bench. A made to measure wooden job for the garage to be precise. To be even more precise it’s 1400mm  long, 580mm wide (deep?) and 1050 high with a 44mm thick top.

Every bloke should have a bench. I particularly need one because two Christmases ago I got a vice. It’s bloomin’ heavy and needs a solid bench to sit on. Never used it other than once last summer to straighten out some tent pegs. Just seemed the right thing to have. Soon my vice will have a permanent home instead of just sitting in its box on a shelf in the garage.

Once my bench is in place I will have to make sure I have all the right tools – circular saw springs to mind but I’m sure there will be others that I need. I will only find out when the bench appears and I know how much space I really have.

topbox arrangement in garageThe garage is undergoing a makeover, as they say on reality TV fix my house up and redo my curtains programmes. First thing I did was replace the extremely dim energy saving bulb installed by Mrs Davies some time ago but which gave off so little light that we needed a torch every time we went to look for something in the garage.

Then I bought a moveable bike rack from Halfords. They had sold out of the brand new ones so I got an ex display model for 25% off (I asked for 50% but hey…). It’s in perfect, “as new” , nick. You will also note from the picture that the top box has moved up the wall using an innovative hook and chain combination to maintain its position. Reg from B&Q, the guy who sold me the Makita drill, suggested the method and it works by golly. Thanks Reg. Works a treat.

Next up then is the bench which I am expecting to get delivered on Saturday if it is the will of a Greater Being (Postman Pat). In researching this post I looked up the manufacturer’s eBay shop. If you want to buy anything else made from wood he does it all. Products are named to work well for SEO. I list some of them here:

wooden bondage stocks fetish spanking
bondage cage fetish kinky fifty shades
Chicken Feeding Station, Field Shelter
2.4m x 1.2m work bench 8×4
garden planter seat bespoke sizes available
spanking horse whipping bench bondage kinky
bondage cross dungeon spanking furniture
solid wood floating wine rack
solid wood floating shelf shelves

Came as a bit of a surprise but hey. A bondage fetishist has to get his or her equipment from somewhere and what better material than a nicely sanded wood. I did think about asking the joiner what proportion of his sales were bondage products. Didn’t think it would be striking up the right kind of conversation somehow. Who can blame him though. We all have to earn a living. Adds a new dimension to the saying “where there’s muck there’s brass”. Innit. It would be interesting to see how he got into that product range in the first place. No it wouldn’t – stay out of there Tref 🙂

I’ll stick up a photo of the bench when it is in situ. I know some of you will be getting excited already. Pic of bikes in bike rack below – floor needs a bit of a clean – I think we will paint it when we put the bench in.

bikes in a new bike rack

Other wonderful wood related posts:

Breaking news – the shed is finished
Partial shed
The shed disassembly
The online garden shed – the answer to privacy issues

Categories
End User fun stuff net neutrality Regs travel

Connected Like a Peasant

On a recent trip to France, I spent a day and a half in Chartres. I toured the cathedral there. I think there are strong similarities between the way we relate to technology today and the way people once related to technology in medieval Europe. This applies to emerging technologies, such as augmented reality and issues of net neutrality.

Chartres.01.205.town.

While in Chartres I learned that the latin word cathdra means seat. Thus, in medieval times the religious centers were the seat of power, which is how those domed buildings that housed the centers of power came to be known as cathedrals. We retain the same sense of the word when we refer to a seat of government, or a county seat – other places where domed buildings house the centers of power. These seats are the places where decisions are made on the behalf of other — is that enough foreshadowing on the net neutrality issue?

I picked up this etymology lesson from an old codger…er, scholar named Malcolm Miller. Or, rather, Sir Malcolm, as the gentleman has been knighted. Twice. Sir Malcolm is a British tour guide — a living legend, really — who has been working at the Chartres cathedral for 57 years. I didn’t know he was a living legend before I arrived in Chartres, however after spending 90 minutes listening to him talk I can see why he is so revered.

The nature of Sir Malcolm’s tour is to tell stories and he did just that, telling us about the meaning of the pictures in the stained glass. He explained that we can approach the elaborate stained glass like we would approach a modern day library. (Remember that the guy is 80 years old. He still thinks libraries serve a vital function. We let it slide. Library…Internet…same thing.)

Sir Malcolm began the tour by asking, “Would you go into a library and say, ‘Let’s meet for an hour and read all the books?’ No, of course not,” he continued, “and so to read all the history just in this church would likewise take a lifetime.”

He was explaining that the church was both a seat of power and a center of learning. That is, in a time when most people did not read or write, in a time when paper did not exist, the sculptures and stained glass of the church were the historical record of society. And who interprets the historical record? Of course, those who hold the money to sponsor the building of that historical record.

Chartres Map

By the end of 2014, according to Cisco research, the number of connected devices will exceed the world’s population — more than seven billion. Imagine that, a world in which digital devices on The Network outnumber humans. And how about this tidbit…by end of this year, 864 million phones and 103 million cars will support augmented reality (AR).

We are becoming more connected to information through our devices. Well, duh.

But is this new? I mean, sure, the mechanics of the digital devices are new, but I mean is it new to have society so interconnected through a mainstream channel of information?

Consider this: Today I can slip Google Glass on my head, hold up a can of creamed corn to read its bar code, and…voila! Google Glass will tell me the story of that can of corn (well, some unnamed database will tell the story). Calories, ingredients, nutritional value, etc., all that metadata tells me a modern story regarding that little piece of the external world. It’s metadata on the real world; the same as a stained glass window was, once upon a time.

I know it is one serious leap, comparing a web site or an Internet-enabled app to a stained glass window in a cathedral, but isn’t it the same relationship? Do we not look at all this metadata and information as stories of the “real” world? Isn’t that what modern technology is trying to provide us now – a way to better understand the world? That, and a means of connecting and communicating with people? That’s the modern version of stained glass in a cathedral.

Chartres.01.124.labyrinth

On the tour, I also learned something about how that stained glass got into those cathedrals. Sir Malcolm pointed out a couple of important features, such as the marks in the stone below each 30-foot high piece of colored glass — marks similar to logos — that identified who paid for that particular piece. Furthermore, our trusty guide said that the story told in each glass was the story that the sponsor wanted to have told. For example, the cobblers of the region paid to put in a stained glass that told the story of the Good Samaritan as well as the story of Adam and Eve’s fall from the Garden of Eden. The cobblers, for some reason, were trying to make a link between those two stories. Sir Malcolm explained that the story in the glass was a commentary on the Bible stories, providing material with which the clergy could instruct society. The commentaries were a way of informing society of two important things: (1) What was in the Bible, and (2) How people should behave, based on what was in the Bible.

So we see that it was not solely the church that interpreted reality. The merchants who worked with and built the church also had a say in the stories being told. These sponsors included guilds of cobblers, water bearers (think municipal water system), bakers, wine makers (think of all that wine purchased for the sacrament), cheese makers (blessed are the cheese makers), etc.

The church of medieval Europe was big business. He who told the story in those seats of power, called cathedrals, controlled the social structure.

Augmented reality? Net neutrality? Some big issues are on the horizon, matters that will change the basic structure of human society. Perhaps we can learn something from the history of the medieval church. Maybe, just maybe, we can take the time to recall the importance of the Golden Rule. You remember the Golden Rule, right? Go look it up — at the library.

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